Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize
