wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
My liver just had a heart attack.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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