ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
NoShamevember. You game?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
