when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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