i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
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