Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
