think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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