That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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