it glows. i had to have it.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize