I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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