my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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