i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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