just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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