marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Randomize
