How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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