My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Randomize