Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
