Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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