i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
