That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize