dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
just found out that she named her cat after me.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize
