i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
