if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
