I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Help me help you realize you are a moron
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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