Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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