I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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