Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
