I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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