these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Randomize
