people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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