I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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