hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
