Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
