We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
