well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
