mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
