Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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