I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
found the other keg... it's in the tree
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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