this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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