Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
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