It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
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