Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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