is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I love you.
Bad choice
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