i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
