hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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