Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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