I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
