You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
