just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
do nipples grow back?
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