miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize
