Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
